Project 365 Day 49

And Exhale

Fortunately, most of our lives the automatic systems our body has in place run without our having to think about them. Take breathing. We breathe without notice, without conscious thought or effort (unless we are exercising...not in itself something I would personally consider natural anyway...). It is truly an automatic reflex. I do not, however, believe that the flame inside me that is my spirit, my soul, is fed by automatic breathing. I think that sometimes it is reduced to a small ember, and blowing on it gently is the only way to keep it alive. A dear friend is right now, at this moment, sitting in a coutroom at her daughter’s murder trial. There is nothing I can do to help her. There is nothing I can do to protect her from the things she is going to see and hear. There is nothing I can do to take any of this away. There is nothing I can do to bring back her daughter. I can only hug her and remind her that she must inhale...and exhale. I cannot cup my hands around her flickering ember and blow gently so it does not go out. I can only try to convince her that it is important that it does not go out. And then, because I feel I am dying with her, I have to remind myself...To breathe...